Tags

, , , , , , , , , ,

I’ve felt alone with family.  I’ve felt alone in relationships.  When I started yoga over 15 years ago, everyone talked about this “oneness”.  I didn’t feel one with anything.  Not even my own body!  When I got to the place of, “Ok, I understand this,” I still felt lonely.  Why would I want to feel one with the murderers and rapists out there?  I don’t want that energy near me!  I continued to struggle with the phrase, We Are One.  If there are supposedly so many people “with” me, where are they?  Where are they when I feel at my worst–or at my best–for that matter?

We Are One

We Are One

Feeling the way I felt, I still continued with my work.  Growing up in a family of eight brothers and sisters and two busy parents, you’d think I would feel included. But no, I didn’t.  I felt excluded.  As I started dating, the unavailable man was always willing to show up for me.  As I got older, I learned to accept my responsibility in my relationships.  Giving off an energy of loneliness and unworthiness, how could I not attract the same into my life?   Unavailable men mirrored back to me all the loneliness I felt myself. I didn’t have to look at my own stuff if I kept blaming them for my feelings.

In yoga retreats, when those around me complained or judged me, I certainly didn’t feel at one with them.  However, I did use my reaction to learn something. How I related to them at that moment was a great message.  What I felt about myself…an even better one.  I learned to forgive and listen to the message.  I was starting to understand this oneness thing.

Now in the present moment, when I am so connected with spirit, I understand even more.  Spirit is always with us. Our guides, angels and spirit animals have our back.  When I think of others who struggle with their addictions and their pain, and I don’t want to get caught up in their energy, I put my guides between us.  As I hold hands with my guides, they hold hands with others.  During meditation, I see others doing the same thing I’m doing.  They aren’t near me in the physical, but they are present with me.  Even when I feel I am the only one around me who feels the way I feel, I remind myself that isn’t true.  I connect with them every day in meditation.  I heal and grow so that others may heal and grow.  I keep doing my work.

Tell me how you feel connected, even though you are alone. I’m open to comments and questions

It is my pleasure to be of service.

Advertisements